Please don’t make me take them! All the possible people came through my mind- grandma babysitter, dad, sister, or a friend? No one was available. Please don’t make me take them to the supermarket again. I can already hear the begging for candy, an inevitable "No", the tantrums, the crying. The scenario always played out the same. If I had no choice, I strategized that saying yes as long as possible was the answer. Yes-yes- yes- filling up the cart with candy, chocolate, ices- yes, yes everything yes was my temporary solution.
Until of course, the arrival at checkout, my last stop, and then the yes had to be remedied. I tell the kids to pick one thing or they can’t get anything at all. I’m not evil; I actually think I’m smart. We are all happy and smiling through the whole supermarket. Yes, people glance at my cart with surprise, disgust and eye rolling thinking I am a horrible mom for feeding my kids this junk. But I am realistic, I found a way to get through it without much grief for all parties involved and it works.When the tantrum begins, I quickly grab my items and race for the exit. My kids learned it’s better to exit with one thing than nothing. Everyone is happy and no one was ignored.
One profound evening I had an epiphany about tantrums, and then it happened. I threw my hands up in the air, stomped my feet and rolled on the floor -screaming ahhhhh - not too loud, just loud enough, to make my three kids and husband stop and look at me for a moment. I did a really good job; I have been through so many tantrums that I was able to replicate it perfectly.
In that insurmountable moment, I considered they might feel the disgust, pit in your stomach and embarrassment that I have experienced during a tantrum. My decision was carefree and slightly ridiculous, but it was a mommy tantrum, and it was invigorating.
Why is it somewhat acceptable for kids to have a tantrum? They may scream, cry, and roll their bodies to the ground. And we usually say, “It’s just a tantrum- if you ignore it will stop”. Can it please be acceptable for a mommy to have a tantrum?
Next time your baby leaks through the diaper on your new pants.
Juice spills on the elegant table during a holiday party.
Your shoulder feels cold and damp from your baby's drool.
Please feel free to have a Mommy tantrum. You are allowed to be annoyed, upset or just plain pissed off. Can a lesson be learned through a mommy tantrum? I hope they will learn that our job is sometimes tough and we also have frustrations.
In hindsight, it might have been a bit over dramatic, but I made my point very clear. At least I made everyone laugh.
Have a mommy tantrum. Kick, scream and cry on the floor, you might find it quite refreshing.